michellesingleton.com // Confessions of the Preacher’s Wife

Like every mother, I treasure time with my children.  My kids are so much fun to be around.  I genuinely enjoy their company. 

A special treat for me is when I get my kids one-on-one.  Experiencing their individual uniqueness in the absence of the other sibling gives me an inside view of the person they are becoming.  [And of course, I never miss the picking and teasing and on-going hassles that creep up among brothers and sisters.]  There is something to be said for undivided attention.

Due to the events of the week-end, I had the priviledge of some one-on-one time with Nathan.  We went hiking.  As we approached the trail head, Nathan asked me, “So Mom, how are you really doing?”  Such a grown-up start to our journey through the woods.

As we made our way down the trail, we talked about my job, soccer camp, favorite breakfasts (Nathan loves scrambled eggs, sausage and donuts) and friendships.  We shared our coping methods for handling daily challenges, disappointments and frustrations.  Nathan told me when he has something to “sort out,” he goes for a walk — alone — to think clearly and to talk to God.  All this as we caught frogs ~ five total! 

We heard a snap in the woods.  Ssshhh!  No more than 15 feet away was a most adorable fawn staring right at us.  We stared back.  For nearly 3 minutes we were still and silent.  Finally, the little guy bolted off.

“Mom, that was a gift from God!  Not everyday do you get to see such a young deer.”  I agreed. 

And not everyday do I get to hike with my son, Nathan, whose name means “gift from God.”    

Today was another day I’ll cherish forever as once again I was reminded that I truly am the luckiest mom in the world!

May God bless you with a Woodland Surprise!

Michelle

My romantic husband planned a Scuba Diving Trip to the Carribbean to celebrate our 10 year Anniversary.  Only when it came around to the actual 10th year, we found ourselves committed to church activities, finances were tight and time was at a premium.  So we celebrated our anniversary at a special restaurant in Charlotte.  I was just as happy.  Any time alone with Rob is my favorite time.

But Rob is a man of his word.  And he never forgot his original plan.  About a month ago, he announced that he had planned a special trip to the Domenican Republic to celebrate our 10th anniversary.  I reminded him that we had now been married 13 years.

Then he told me that 10 years was a landmark date for him.  “I never  forgot how I wanted to take you away to celebrate our 10th year.  This trip is for the 10 (plus 3) most wonderful years of my life.  I hope you think it was worth the wait.”

Am I ever glad God had been teaching me to wait.  Had I not allow God to work on my W.I.Y.S., I could have easily ruined what Rob and God had in store for me this week with my impatient self.  But, God has shown me over and over that Rob was definitely worth the wait………gotta pack……..Bon Voyage!
 

Waiting has never been easy for me.  I struggle with W.I.Y.S. (Wanting It Yesterday Syndrome).  But I am getting better.  Through the years, God continues to show me that His timing is always best, always perfect.  Check out these scriptures.

Isaiah 30:17 (MSG)
But God’s not finished. He’s waiting around to be gracious to you. He’s gathering strength to show mercy to you. God takes the time to do everything right—everything. Those who wait around for him are the lucky ones.

Isaiah 40:31 (NKJV)
But those who wait on the LORD Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.

Lamentations 3:28 (MSG)
When life is heavy and hard to take, go off by yourself. Enter the silence. Bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions: Wait for hope to appear. Don’t run from trouble. Take it full-face. The “worst” is never the worst.

Romans 8:22 (MSG)
All around us we observe a pregnant creation. The difficult times of pain throughout the world are simply birth pangs. But it’s not only around us; it’s within us. The Spirit of God is arousing us within. We’re also feeling the birth pangs. These sterile and barren bodies of ours are yearning for full deliverance. That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting. We, of course, don’t see what is enlarging us. But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy.

So it seems that waiting is actually good for us….more tomorrow………. 

Continued from Tony Snow’s testimony:

Most of us have watched friends as they drifted toward God’s arms not with resignation, but with peace and hope. In so doing, they have taught us not how to die, but how to live. They have emulated Christ by transmitting the power and authority of love.

I sat by my best friend’s bedside a few years ago as a wasting cancer took him away. He kept at his table a worn Bible and a 1928 edition of the Book of Common Prayer. A shattering grief disabled his family, many of his old friends, and at least one priest. Here was a humble and very good guy, someone who apologized when he winced with pain because he thought it made his guest uncomfortable. He retained his equanimity and good humor literally until his last conscious moment. “I’m going to try to beat [this cancer],” he told me several months before he died. “But if I don’t, I’ll see you on the other side.”

His gift was to remind everyone around him that even though God doesn’t promise us tomorrow, he does promise us eternity—filled with life and love we cannot comprehend—and that one can in the throes of sickness point the rest of us toward timeless truths that will help us weather future storms.

Through such trials, God bids us to choose: Do we believe, or do we not? Will we be bold enough to love, daring enough to serve, humble enough to submit, and strong enough to acknowledge our limitations? Can we surrender our concern in things that don’t matter so that we might devote our remaining days to things that do?

When our faith flags, he throws reminders in our way. Think of the prayer warriors in our midst. They change things, and those of us who have been on the receiving end of their petitions and intercessions know it.

It is hard to describe, but there are times when suddenly the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and you feel a surge of the Spirit. Somehow you just know: Others have chosen, when talking to the Author of all creation, to lift us up—to speak of us!

This is love of a very special order. But so is the ability to sit back and appreciate the wonder of every created thing. The mere thought of death somehow makes every blessing vivid, every happiness more luminous and intense. We may not know how our contest with sickness will end, but we have felt the ineluctable touch of God.

What is man that Thou art mindful of him? We don’t know much, but we know this: No matter where we are, no matter what we do, no matter how bleak or frightening our prospects, each and every one of us, each and every day, lies in the same safe and impregnable place—in the hollow of God’s hand.

T. Snow

 It is one thing to speak like this when one’s health is well.  Quite another to write this when you are undergoing cancer treatment.  Tony Snow’s testimony has given me much to think about.

Continued from yesterday’s post….Tony Snow’s testimony:

‘You Have Been Called’

Picture yourself in a hospital bed. The fog of anesthesia has begun to wear away. A doctor stands at your feet; a loved one holds your hand at the side. “It’s cancer,” the healer announces.

The natural reaction is to turn to God and ask him to serve as a cosmic Santa. “Dear God, make it all go away. Make everything simpler.” But another voice whispers: “You have been called.” Your quandary has drawn you closer to God, closer to those you love, closer to the issues that matter—and has dragged into insignificance the banal concerns that occupy our “normal time.”

There’s another kind of response, although usually short-lived—an inexplicable shudder of excitement, as if a clarifying moment of calamity has swept away everything trivial and tinny, and placed before us the challenge of important questions.

The moment you enter the Valley of the Shadow of Death, things change. You discover that Christianity is not something doughy, passive, pious, and soft. Faith may be the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. But it also draws you into a world shorn of fearful caution. The life of belief teems with thrills, boldness, danger, shocks, reversals, triumphs, and epiphanies. Think of Paul, traipsing though the known world and contemplating trips to what must have seemed the antipodes (Spain), shaking the dust from his sandals, worrying not about the morrow, but only about the moment.

There’s nothing wilder than a life of humble virtue—for it is through selflessness and service that God wrings from our bodies and spirits the most we ever could give, the most we ever could offer, and the most we ever could do.

Finally, we can let love change everything. When Jesus was faced with the prospect of crucifixion, he grieved not for himself, but for us. He cried for Jerusalem before entering the holy city. From the Cross, he took on the cumulative burden of human sin and weakness, and begged for forgiveness on our behalf.

We get repeated chances to learn that life is not about us—that we acquire purpose and satisfaction by sharing in God’s love for others. Sickness gets us partway there. It reminds us of our limitations and dependence. But it also gives us a chance to serve the healthy. A minister friend of mine observes that people suffering grave afflictions often acquire the faith of two people, while loved ones accept the burden of two people’s worries and fears.

To be continued …

It is very sad to learn that someone who has given a strong testimony for the Lord has gone to be with Jesus, leaving behind his family.  

    Tony Snow died last week at the age of 53. 

Commentator and broadcaster Tony Snow announced that he had colon cancer in 2005. Following surgery and chemo-therapy, Snow joined the Bush administration in April 2006 as press secretary. Unfortunately, on March 23 Snow, 51, a husband and father of three, announced that the cancer had recurred, with tumors found in his abdomen—leading to surgery in April, followed by more chemotherapy. Snow went back to work in the White House Briefing Room on May 30, but resigned August 31. CT asked Snow what spiritual lessons he has been learning through the ordeal.

I’d like to share a portion of his testimony that appeared in Christianity Today in 2007.

Blessings arrive in unexpected packages—in my case, cancer.

Those of us with potentially fatal diseases—and there are millions in America today—find ourselves in the odd position of coping with our mortality while trying to fathom God’s will. Although it would be the height of presumption to declare with confidence What It All Means, Scripture provides powerful hints and consolations.

The first is that we shouldn’t spend too much time trying to answer the why questions: Why me? Why must people suffer? Why can’t someone else get sick? We can’t answer such things, and the questions themselves often are designed more to express our anguish than to solicit an answer.

I don’t know why I have cancer, and I don’t much care. It is what it is—a plain and indisputable fact. Yet even while staring into a mirror darkly, great and stunning truths begin to take shape. Our maladies define a central feature of our existence: We are fallen. We are imperfect. Our bodies give out.

But despite this—because of it—God offers the possibility of salvation and grace. We don’t know how the narrative of our lives will end, but we get to choose how to use the interval between now and the moment we meet our Creator face-to-face.

Second, we need to get past the anxiety. The mere thought of dying can send adrenaline flooding through your system. A dizzy, unfocused panic seizes you. Your heart thumps; your head swims. You think of nothingness and swoon. You fear partings; you worry about the impact on family and friends. You fidget and get nowhere.

To regain footing, remember that we were born not into death, but into life—and that the journey continues after we have finished our days on this earth. We accept this on faith, but that faith is nourished by a conviction that stirs even within many nonbelieving hearts—an intuition that the gift of life, once given, cannot be taken away. Those who have been stricken enjoy the special privilege of being able to fight with their might, main, and faith to live—fully, richly, exuberantly—no matter how their days may be numbered.

Third, we can open our eyes and hearts. God relishes surprise. We want lives of simple, predictable ease—smooth, even trails as far as the eye can see—but God likes to go off-road. He provokes us with twists and turns. He places us in predicaments that seem to defy our endurance and comprehension—and yet don’t. By his love and grace, we persevere. The challenges that make our hearts leap and stomachs churn invariably strengthen our faith and grant measures of wisdom and joy we would not experience otherwise.

To be continued tomorrow……….

Anyone remember the Walton Family?  Not Sam from Wal-Mart, but the Walton family from Walton’s Mountain in Virginia.  How about the TV series that ran during the 1970’s?  Sure you do.

We’ve been watching dvds of this family that lived during the Great Depression.  There are a lot of lessons to be learned.  Last night, we watched an episode where the family was called to stand by the dad’s side.  Although there was not much evidence in John Walton’s defense, the family stuck together, believing the best in their dad.  Their decision to do this was based on John Walton’s character.  John Walton lived with integrity.  Always.  

Johnboy summarized the episode this way.  “Although the Depression brought us hard times, our strong family ties kept us together.  In plenty and in want, we always had each other.”

It is a true blessing to have strong family ties.  It takes commitment and work.  But oh the blessings……..  A strong family is always there for you.  And togetherness is a priceless gift.

May God strengthen your family today.

Michelle

Yesterday I metioned that we saw the American Girl Doll movie Kit Kittredge.  A great movie of a girl who lived during the Great Depression.

Besides providing our daughters with a nice history lesson, there was an underlying theme of Community and The Golden Rule.  Kit’s mother was a compassionate and kind woman with a tender heart for people — no matter of their social, economic or educational status. 

By being a living example, Kit’s mother instilled this same heart in her daughter.  They accepted others as they were and believed the best in them. 

This is a wonderful attribute that Jesus Christ also teaches us through His word, the Bible.  Luke 6:31 (NIV)  tells us to “Do to others as you would have them do to you.”  This is called “The Golden Rule.”

The Message puts it this way:  “Here is a simple rule of thumb for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you; then grab the initiative and do it for them!

The next verses go on to say:  If you only love the lovable, do you expect a pat on the back? Run-of-the-mill sinners do that. If you only help those who help you, do you expect a medal? Garden-variety sinners do that. If you only give for what you hope to get out of it, do you think that’s charity? The stingiest of pawnbrokers does that.

Living by the Golden Rule.  I wonder if the movie critics will catch that theme. 

Something to think about.

Juliana (and I) hosted an American Girl Doll Sleepover last Saturday.  After  seeing the new movie “Kit Kittredge,” Juliana’s girlfriends came back to our house for a night of slumber party fun!  So much laughing and giggling— all night— I didn’t sleep a wink and I am quite sure the girls didn’t either. 

Sunday morning, the girls dressed for church and came downstairs with their dolls for a Breakfast Tea.  I used my china teacups and served all sorts of savories and pastries.  The girls’ manners were amazing.  I’d have to say they were truly young ladies.

Conversation was more than interesting.  Table talk turned to hair accessories and earrings.  One girl shared her latest trick: catching a lizard, rubbing its tummy and then letting it bite her earlobe.  “It makes a really cool earring!”

I would have never believed it until I saw it myself.  What a fashion statement!  What fun! 

We laughed so hard ‘til I cried — really!  I love spending time with Juliana and her friends.  They certainly keep me up on the latest fasion trends!

Juliana spent the night at a sweet friend’s house and was very excited to tell me all about her special time.  She gave me a big hug, (Juliana gives great hugs), and proudly pulled from behind her back a Worry Doll.  “Mom, Look what I made!”                        

Juliana’s Doll was a most adorable 3 inch paper doll with fabric clothing, yarn hair and a smiling face.  Very cute!

“It is so neat the way it works, Mom!  All you have to do is tell the doll your worry and she will take it away.  Try it!”

According to Guatemala folklore, a child, who cannot sleep, can tell their worries to a doll and place it under their pillow.  The doll is thought to worry in the person’s place, therefore permitting the person to sleep peacefully.  The child wakes up worry-free as the doll takes away their worries during the night. 

What a neat way to teach our girls God’s own formula for our worries.  The Bible tells us in 1 Peter 5:7 (NLT) Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.

Michelle