michellesingleton.com // Confessions of the Preacher’s Wife

This past week-end, Juliana competed in the Carolina Dance Masters Performing Arts Competition.  This was her first competition of this season and she was a bit nervous and jittery waiting her turn.  

“Mom, I was so nervous.  But when I walked on stage, I knew I was where I was supposed to be!”

I love that!  I’ll probably quote her over and over again.  Juliana’s words made me stop and think, do I know where I’m supposed be?  Am I there?

My days are always better when I’ve prayed through them early in the morning and I’ve listened to the directions of my loving, Heavenly Father.  When I run my agenda by Him and I am obedient to follow His promptings and lead, I can be confidant that I am where I’m supposed to be.

Sometimes this means moving my schedule around, adding an extra phone call or email to a friend, making an extra stop or adding an extra kid to the mix.  Sometimes it means saying “no” or staying home or making room for someone at our dinner table.

But always, it is very freeing it is to be right where God wants me to be! 

I don’t usually take the time to forward emails.  But this one, sent to me by my mother, is worth reading…even a second time…  It offers great thoughts to start the week.  Enjoy!

IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER - by Erma Bombeck
(written after she found out she was dying from cancer).

 I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.

 I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.
 
 I would have talked less and listened more.

 I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.
 
 I would have eaten the popcorn in the ‘good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.
 
 I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

 I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.
 
 I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.
 
 I would have sat on the lawn with my grass stains.

 I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.

 I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn’t show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.
 
 Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

 When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, ‘Later. Now go get washed up for dinner.’ There would have been more ‘I love you’s’ More ‘I’m sorry’s.’

 But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute…look at it and really see it … live it and never give it back. STOP SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF!!!

 Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what.  Instead, let’s cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us.

Did you ever have one of those days when everything went right?  For us Singletons, last Saturday was one of those days. 

It started out with a gorgeous Carolina blue sky, plenty of sunshine and an 11:00 soccer game.  Nathan ruled the field and led his team to a victory (3–0).  As a proud mom, I must add that Nathan was responsible for 2 assists and 1 goal.  But I was especially impressed with the way he encouraged his teammates as well as the other team’s players.  No, I could not have been a more proud soccer mom.

Then we headed over to the new “Q” at Siskey and I found a gift card in my purse to cover almost our entire lunch ~ I handed over 25 cents.  The Q was celebrating their grand opening and the manager brought us homemade cookies and brownies “on the house.”  If that wasn’t enough, a local radio station was there to add to the celebration and loaded Nathan and Juliana down with lots of free stuff:  T-shirts, flashlights, frisbees and best of all…..at least for Juliana, the new Jonas Brothers cd!

The whole day cost us a quarter! 

How easy it is to turn to God when things are not going right.  I am guilty of that.  But today, we made it a point to acknowledge that He was the true source of our fabulous day!

May God bless you with a day where everything goes right!

While I was working through the kidney stone last week, my kids really picked up where I couldn’t help out.  I was amazed to learn that Nathan could prepare breakfast (more than cereal) without me:  scrambled eggs, sausage and fresh fruit cups!  He can cook a mean hamburger too!  Juliana packed school lunches each day.

The laundry was washed, dried, folded and neatly put away.  The dishwasher was loaded, run, unloaded each day and my kitchen was pretty much spotless.  I hate to admit it but my house was cleaner than usual.  My baseboards were even cleaned… case in point!

I was sharing this with one of my girlfriends whose kids are grown.  “Michelle, it looks like you are raising your kids to be adults.” 

“What does that mean?” I asked.

She explained that some people raise their kids to be kids…. even when their children’s age indicates they should be grown up, they remain helpless or “needy” without their parents.  Other kids are raised to function independently without parental interference.  I appreciated her encouragement.

And while I realize my children still have a long way to go, it is nice to see that they are on their way to becoming independent adults.

I passed the stone.  Oh Happy Day!  And what an ugly little chunk it was!

I think it was Nathan who said it looked like an alien. 

Thanks for your prayers.  I think I’m on my way back!

Good news!  After another visit to the hospital, my stone has moved down about 2 inches over the past week!  Not so good news, it is a big one which is why it is taking so long….

Thank you all for your prayers, cards and meals.  I am actually functioning quite well thanks to your prayers…… I’ve decided that pain meds are actually a gift from God too!

I’ll post an update soon….

For 4 days I am peeing through a strainer in attempt to catch the little stone that has caused me much pain and grief.  Still nothing.  I have been pumping the fluids in me but nothing….

I have heard from others who have had kidney stones that once the stone passes, the pain is instantly gone.  My pain meds are beginning to run low and I am in great expectation of seeing that little rock…..

My kids ask every few hours, Rob asks, family and friends want to know…. we are all anxious to get mom back!  I will keep you posted and write more when I catch the evil culprit!

Friday afternoon I was driving home from a conference in Greensboro.  Without warning, I began to experience awful pain in my low back.  Very quickly the pain intensified and I started to vomit…..

It was an ugly sight….throwing up in my car right there on I-85.  I knew I had to find a place to stop and get help. 

God was looking out for me.  The very next sign was a hospital road sign ~ a very welcome sight!  I took that exit and followed the arrows to the hospital in Concord and checked myself into the E.R.

By this time the pain was excruciating…. felt like horrible back labor.  I delivered both of my children naturally and this pain seemed much worse. 

The E.R. was very busy and they did not have a room for me.  So I sat in the lobby with a bedpan trying not to make a scene as I continued to vomit in front of the many patients and family members who were also waiting.  It was very humbling. 

Two hours later, I was escorted back to triage, tests were run including a CT Scan.  Diagnosis?  A kidney stone!  Apparently the stone was lodged in my right ureter 1/2 way between my kidney and my bladder which explains why my urine was full of blood.

They gave me an IV to replace the fluids I had lost and some pain meds.  Ahhh!  Finally some pain relief.  Rob, the kids and a good friend came to pick me up and drive my car home.

I spent the entire week-end in bed.  And I have not yet passed the stone.  One of our staff pastors relayed a message to me:  “This too shall pass!”  We all chuckled.

Actually, it is comforting to know that the pain and suffering we go through here on earth is temporary.  So glad that my eternity is secure ~ I’ll be in heaven and painfree!

I have had the nicest of people taking care of me and my “stone” issues.  During one of my hospital visits, an especially kind and gentle woman was assisting me in my paperwork.  There had to be something to her happiness.  When she stepped out of her office, I glanced up and saw this post on her bulletin board.  It brightened my day and gave me a lot to think about…hope it adds some sunshine to yours:

10 Rules for a Happy Day

1. TODAY I WILL NOT STRIKE BACK:
If someone is rude, if someone is impatient, if someone is unkind… I will not respond in a like manner.

2. TODAY I WILL ASK GOD TO BLESS MY “ENEMY”:
If I come across someone who treats me harshly or unfairly, I will quietly ask GOD to bless that individual. I understand the “enemy” could be a family member, neighbor, co-worker or stranger.

3. TODAY I WILL BE CAREFUL ABOUT WHAT I SAY:
I will carefully choose and guard my words being certain that I do not spread gossip.

4. TODAY I WILL GO THE EXTRA MILE:
I will find ways to help share the burden of another person.

5. TODAY I WILL FORGIVE:
I will forgive any hurts or injuries that come my way.

6. TODAY I WILL DO SOMETHING NICE FOR SOMEONE, BUT I WILL NOT DO IT SECRETLY:
I will reach out anonymously and bless the life of another.

7. TODAY I WILL TREAT OTHERS THE WAY I WISH TO BE TREATED:
I will practice the golden rule - “Do unto others as I would have them do unto me” - with everyone I encounter.

8. TODAY I WILL RAISE THE SPIRITS OF SOMEONE WHO IS DISCOURAGED:
My smile, my words, my expression of support, can make the difference to someone who is wrestling with life.

9. TODAY I WILL NURTURE MY BODY:
I will eat less; I will eat only healthy foods. I will thank GOD for my body.

10. TODAY I WILL GROW SPIRITUALLY:
I will spend a little more time in prayer today;
I will begin reading something spiritual or inspirational today;
I will find a quiet place (at some point during this day) and listen to GOD’s voice!

“But since we belong to the day, let us be self controlled, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and hope of salvation as a helmet.” - 1 Thes. 5:8

Author Unknown

Nathan’s science project is absolutely fantastic — today!  But that was not the case yesterday.  He ran into many challenges:

1. Our kitchen scales were not sensitive enough to measure the iron powder attracted by the electromagnetic field.
2. The copper magnet wire would not make a good contact with the battery and kept “sparking.” 
3. The iron powder spilled everywhere.  Thankfully we are the proud owners of an alnico cow magnet….

The diaster list continued to grow.  We’d correct one problem only to have another one appear out of nowhere.  At one point, we were certain that Murphy’s Law was actually true.  There were more things going wrong than going right with this experiment.  And our nerves were just about to come unglued.

“Mom, maybe this is why scientists are mad.”  I started laughing and Nathan grinned.  He made a good point.

But Nathan persevered and his hypothesis was tested and completed using the scientific method without compromise.

I would not trade the difficulties that Nathan faced with his experiment for a “problem-free” ride.  Life is full of difficulties.  And Nathan learned that when he stuck to the challenges with a solution-oriented mind, the problems could be solved.

Today, my prayer for my children is that they would develop a solution-oriented mind.

Blessings in the Journey!

 Michelle